Yesterday I was at the Jewel on Stony Island and I ran into a friend I went to grammar school with back in the day. She introduced me to her son, who was all of thirteen. She was a bit distraught with him because he had been sneaking out of the house in the middle of the night to hook up with some little girl. My friend was blasting him in the middle of the store so I was hesitant to say hello, but I knew it would be worse if I passed her and didn’t say anything at all.
What she didn’t share with him was that when we were his age, back in the stone ages, we had two friends who had a baby when they were around his age. It was a neighborhood scandal, they were both too young to know what they had gotten into. They had missed the “Love is nothing new”, “Everything you’re doing ain’t nothing but a re-run” and “You didn’t invent love” speeches that I heard on a regular basis when I was little. Between those lectures, watching someone ruin their life close up and in person, and the movies of the time, I was very careful as a kid when it came to boys – had to be.
What she didn’t share with him was that when we were his age, back in the stone ages, we had two friends who had a baby when they were around his age. It was a neighborhood scandal, they were both too young to know what they had gotten into. They had missed the “Love is nothing new”, “Everything you’re doing ain’t nothing but a re-run” and “You didn’t invent love” speeches that I heard on a regular basis when I was little. Between those lectures, watching someone ruin their life close up and in person, and the movies of the time, I was very careful as a kid when it came to boys – had to be.
If it were my world, every kid would see a few movies to set the foundation – “Gone With The Wind” – it’s long, but being young and foolish and not thinking about the consequences of one’s actions is a major topic – it’s generally applied to the war, but the love story is layered in - the main character is running after a man who says in the first fifteen minutes of the movie “I don’t want you”, her response is to chase him down like the last coke can in the vending machine. The book offers better lessons but it is horrendously long. It’s kid appropriate though.
“The Last Picture Show” – every kid should see what high school is really about beforehand. It takes the romance out of it and shows some of the hidden motivations, the back stage drama that you might miss if your head is in the clouds. It’s a stinging rebuke to the myth of “love at first sight”. Make sure you’ve had “the talk” before they see this one.
“Sparkle” – the drug angle alone makes this required viewing for all kids, but it is admittedly brutal. When I was little, there were commercials about the dangers of smoking. When I was a little older, there were commercials about the dangers of drugs. I don’t see those anymore but the message still needs to get out – being an addict is only going to shorten your life. Being turned into an addict by someone who claims they love you is a foolish choice. I’m curious to see what Whitney Houston is going to do with the movie now that she is remaking it. The original was low budget but effective – everyone saw it when it came out. I practically know all the lines in “Sparkle” by heart, it’s one of my favorite movies. I was singing the songs even before I got to Kenwood.
“The Other Side of Midnight” – a crash course for a teen-ager, but also required to see a real jerk operate during an uncertain time. Times change but people don’t and everyone is going to meet a Larry or two in their time. Forewarned is forearmed so that you can recognize a hurricane before it hits you. This story is also spread out over time, but it is very effective. You’ve got to learn to separate the wheat from the chaff. Some will be distracted, but you can’t afford to be.
